Marriage counseling become more and more popular these days. Before you visit a counselor you will make some research to find the best variant for you. In this research you should take into account a lot of different aspects: studies and practical experience in handling of problems like yours, it is better to perform a brief interview with counselor trough the phone. Also very important factor – don’t think that “cheaper means worse”. Many counselors can change rates with accordance to you ability to pay, but counselors with low rates commonly have very high load and even can’t talk with you by telephone without appointment.
First, what you will need to do – is to find a appropriate marriage counselor. You can ask your friends for comments, search through yellow pages of through the internet. You also can contact your physician to get an advice of recommendations. During your search try to participate your spouse in it, because you selecting a counselor for both of you and you both need to accept him before starting a therapy. When you choose some number of variants you should to each of them and get answers of the following questions: – Does he have a license of AAMFT (American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy)? – What is his experience in problems like yours? – What kind of problems he resolved in past? – How long he has a personal practice? – Does he solving problems of marital planning? And any other questions in which you are interested. After this you can decide to which counselor you should go.
What to expect in the sessions? First session. Receptionist should ask you to wait in the waiting room if you arrive earlier and also you will need to fill out registration form and contracts (read it carefully to avoid any surprises). Waiting room should help you to relax. It is very important to arrive at time, because most of the counselors have very crowded schedule, but counselor concerned in this too, because you time is also important. You or counselor can be late once, but it shouldn’t be a pattern. The purpose of the first session is to familiarize you with counselor. One counselors prefer to familiarize face to face with each of the married, other – to familiarize work with both of you from the beginning. On the first session wouldn’t be any treatment – only familiarizing, formulating and, maybe, planning of course. Also you will need to complete special forms to help counselor detect and determine your marital problems. The second session will be scheduled in a few days – it’s important, because you will suffer from your problems and would like to start treatment as soon as possible.
After you choose exact counselor you will make an appointment with him. It is very important to not be late, because counselor might have a tight schedule. At the first visit secretary will ask you to fill in registration from and contracts – read them carefully to avoid any misunderstanding. At the first session counselor interview both of you individually (to avoid influence of spouse on your answers) about your problems and than ask both of you to fill a questionnaire to give him more information about your family and your problems. On the second session counselor will discuss with you filled questionnaires and you together will create a plan of your treatment. Than, all the treatment will pass according to this plan.
Treatment. All treatment will pass in accordance to plan. If you choose right counselor you will feel improvements over a period of treatment. But here is a trap – you may decide that all is ok and you don’t need treatment anymore. If you have feelings like this – discuss them with counselor. If you feel no improvements – discuss with your spouse probability of counselors substitution.
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